Grieve with Hope
We took this photo after spen
ding time praying for Ella’s court hearing. We had this strange joyful, dreadful, excited anticipation. Maybe we would have said we felt full of hope.
But today, we found out our case was not heard. We had pleaded with the Lord. So many of you faithfully prayed with us. Our hearts are heavy, our eyes are tear-filled, our souls are weary. And yet I would say today we may have even more hope than when we did when we took this. The hope that remains after the disappointment is a different kind. It’s the rock on which we stand. It’s not a cycle of wishful thinking followed by disappointment, but a firm foundation.
I am sad for her. I am weary thinking about this process dragging on. I am fearful of how long it may be until she is home. I’m exhausted from this process. I am disappointed that we didn’t see the miracle today. These are all legitimate things to feel and yet my foundation remains sure.
One day. All will be made right. What was once broken will be somehow made whole. The pain, delays and profound losses of this journey will all be somehow redeemed and made full. What feels like death now will be beautiful life. I hope I get a glimpse of this in this life, but if not, it will forever be my experience for eternity. One day, it will be clear that none of this struggle or suffering was in vain.