He Came to Make Broken Beautiful
Last year, Christmas felt incomplete. We looked at Kai's pictures, watched his videos, talked about him and dreamed about who he might be. No amount of thinking or talking could make up for the fact that he was thousands of miles away, living in an orphanage on the other side of the world. Part of our hearts were with him.
Asher chose this special gift for him last year. It sat in Kai's room for many months, waiting for the day he would finally be home.
This year, he is with us. This year, for the first time, Kai is with his family- his forever family. We have him in our arms now, and he is so much more than we dreamed. He is kind and sensitive. He is thoughtful. He is affectionate and hilarious. He loves to instigate. He is picking up words and this new life quickly, day by day. He copies everything his brother says and does. His little voice is precious and I love to hear him repeat songs about Jesus' love for him. His giggle and mischievous grin make us laugh all the time.
One of the greatest gifts of this adoption is how much more I see of who God really is. Christmas looks a little different to me this year. Christmas isn't just about celebrating the birth of our Savior. It is about celebrating the fact that our Savior came to us. Jesus. Came. To. Us. He humbled Himself. He chose to take on all of the limitations and suffering and brokenness of living in this world. Our Savior moved towards us, because we could not move towards Him.
When we traveled to China for Kai, we knew we were going to have difficulties. We were prepared for how hard adoption would be. We knew the journey would be hard, but we chose to go, regardless of what would lie ahead. We chose him. We said yes to financial burden, weeks and months dedicated to paperwork, medical issues we didn't understand, and fears of how he might struggle. We chose all of this to come to him. There was nothing he could do to get to us. In fact, he didn't know how desperate and needy he really was.
Do you know what's even more amazing about God? He chooses the broken. He doesn't just fix what's broken, but He desires, He purposes to work through the broken. He could have chosen to save the world in a different way, but he chose the broken. The Christmas story isn't just about a baby being born to a girl in a stable. The nativity the boys play with doesn't quite portray the whole story. Christmas is so profoundly beautiful because God chose for the redemption of the world to come through all sorts of brokenness. And He continues to choose the broken.
Kai needed someone to come to him and we came. We would do it over in a heartbeat. Not because he has done anything to earn it, but because we love him and we have been loved by this kind of radical love that God has for the broken. When you are touched by this incredible love, it changes your capacity to love others.
God came to us at Christmas. And He chooses the broken. He chooses the unlovely. He chooses the forgotten. He chooses the messed up. When we see that God moves towards us in our broken and messed up places, we begin to see that those places are the very ones God makes beautiful. Adoption is hard. Infertility hurts. Brain tumors are scary. Attachment is slow and feels fruitless at times. But these are truly the places where beauty is rising.